10 Genuine Tips on How to Make Long Distance Relationships Work

Making a long distance relationship work can be hard. But that’s not to say that it’s any less rewarding than a normal relationship where both partners aren’t separated by geographical location. 

Most adults go through a point in their dating life when they are temporarily separated from the person they love. While the challenges it brings are many, with the right mindset and commitment from both partners, long distance relationships can be just as happy, fulfilling and enduring as any other relationship. 

Many couples who have successfully built a happy life together even vouch for the period of long distance as one of the keystones of their long lasting relationship. 

If you’re currently in a long distance relationship with someone you absolutely love and see yourself with in the future, but are having a hard time with the physical distance between you, take comfort in knowing that long distance relationships can work and your chances of making it with that person are not any less. 

Some personal background and experience 

Me and my wife have been together for almost 6 years now. We met back in 2018 and due to circumstances, have had to do long distance up until we got married in October 2023. Five years of long distance has allowed both of us to learn so much about what it takes to make it work.

While every relationship is unique, when it comes to making a long distance relationship work, there are some important values that both partners need to discuss, respect, and withhold. 

Do long distance relationships work?

In short, the answer is absolutely yes. Long distance relationships have just as much of a chance of working as a relationship where the couple lives close to each other given that in the long distance relationship also, the couple are able to visit each other in person at least a few times a year.

And don’t let anyone else make you believe otherwise. Not every relationship will work long distance or not and it doesn’t need to. Every person’s judgment is influenced by personal experiences of themselves or people they know. 

Why are long distance relationships hard?

Every romantic relationship poses its challenges. However, long distance relationships have some unique challenges that come along with geographical separation, infrequent communication, and financial challenges of traveling to see each other. Let’s look at some of the common challenges faced by couples in long distance relationships.

• Unable to see each other in person as much as you would like to
• Disagreement between how often and how much to communicate with each other
• Lack of understanding of the real-life situation of your partner, circle of friends, and existing relationships with friends and colleagues 
• Uncertainty of when the long distance can end and both of you can start living in the same area where you’ll be able to see each other regularly
• More intense emotions, jealousy, insecurity, anger, etc related to the relationship
• The financial burden of traveling expenses to visit each other

How to make long distance relationships work

If you’re still reading, I believe you are the kind of person willing to make it work despite the difficulties and pain of enduring a long distance relationship. 

Below are in my experience 10 very important tips to consider if you and your partner are willing to put in the work and go the distance in your relationship.

1. Prioritize each other

This is the most important aspect of any romantic relationship even more in long distance relationship. Both you and your partner should commit to prioritizing each other for the long term. 

This is not to say to drop everything else in your life. Of course, your work and career growth, family, friends, and self-care time are very important. However, be ready to sometimes be there for your loved one instead of that night out with friends. 

It’s all about balance and both partners being on the same page. 

2. Make an effort to always communicate in some form in the morning and before bed

This might not be very important for all couples. But I feel that it’s something that means a lot to most people. To know that your partner is okay at the start and end of every day. 

It gives the perfect opportunity to check in with each other, talk about how the other’s day went, and wish each other well at the start of the day. 

Spending time with each other using the means of video and audio calls can help to build closeness and intimacy which are super important to make a romantic relationship last. 

3. Try to meet in person as often as possible

Now this may always be possible or convenient. But every couple can have a schedule that works for both people. Depending on how far you’re from each other, you can plan to meet on weekends, once a month, or a few times a year.

Taking the time to come see each other shows both partners how much you value each other and reinforces your love and commitment to each other. 

4. Have something to look forward to together

Most moments in life are mundane and filled with different tasks that may not be meaningful to you. As a couple, it’s no different, and going for too long without anything to look forward to can make both partners feel that their relationship lacks excitement and experiences to be shared.

Even if you’re living far from each other, always make plans to do things together. It can be to go see a movie the next time you meet each other, go for a romantic dinner, a weekend escape, or travel together on a vacation. 

5. Always trust your partner as long as they don’t give you a reason not to 

This is a big one. A lot of relationships fail due to a lack of trust in one another. All of us carry the baggage and pain of our past experiences. If you have been betrayed in the past, you may find it difficult to build trust in your partner. 

But always understand that this is a new person who has not betrayed you. I know this is easier said than done, but if you are going to make a long distance relationship work, you have to find a way to trust your partner until and unless that person starts giving you reasons not to.

This is not meant to say be naive, you must also be watchful of any odd behaviors and make sure to talk to your partner respectfully if you have doubts about something or a situation involving your partner. 

6. Always check in with your partner on how they are feeling

Small gestures as simple as regularly checking in with your partner on how they are feeling can be an impactful way to let them know you care about their feelings and well-being. 

Not only does it help to build trust and closeness but can leave a lasting impression on how safe and intimate you feel with one another. 

7. Talk about future plans

Now this step depends also on how long you’ve been together. Some couples become close really fast while others take much more time to learn each other before making bigger commitments. 

Being far from each other can make you feel isolated from your partner and make it seem like your relationship is much more fragile than a relationship where two people live in the same city. Talking about future plans together can reassure each other that your intentions are towards the same things and both of you see each other in your future. 

8. Compliment each other

Just because you are far from each other geographically doesn’t mean you can’t make each other feel good about themselves. When you’re talking to your partner via video calls or even sharing photos, take the time to compliment each other. 

Compliments are not just about physical beauty but also about how you treat each other, other aspects of their life, and how they handle things. It’s a way of appreciating each other and the qualities that brought you both together. 

9. When things get difficult, give each other space

Long distance or not, romantic relationships can be very hard. Not always, but you can speak to any couple and they will tell you they had to work through a lot of hardships to make it work. 

Long distance relationships can carry the additional burden of lack of physical touch and make things harder when issues come up. It’s important to create some boundaries and how to react when such things happen. 

However, giving each other the space to process things, regather your thoughts, and talk to each other when the heat of the moment has passed, can allow both of you to see things more clearly and solve problems in a healthier way.

10. Continue to work on yourself

Even if you now see yourself as part of a couple, your own traits, habits, and ways of doing things can influence how healthy your relationship is. So just because you are in a relationship now, don’t stop working on yourself. 

Do the things you would normally do, maybe even do it better now to become the best partner for your loved one. Continue to learn new things, create healthy habits, and become the best version of yourself.

Conclusion

After all you’ve been through, you may ask. Should I commit to a long distance relationship? If the person you’re with is worth the challenges and both of you are willing to work on your relationship, then absolutely. 

Despite the challenges, if two people are willing to put their differences aside and put in the work to make a long distance relationship work, it can be one of the most rewarding and fulfilling things in your life.